Chapter One
Kalarcode to Kottathala
I’m in no doubt about where this story begins as my thoughts take me straight to Kottathala. Nestled deep in the Quillon district, in the Kottarakara taluka, lies a beautiful, sylvan and somewhat sleepy little village named Kottathala. Of course, I look at the place from behind rose-tinted glasses. Many other people would say that this little village was located in the back of beyond and the neighbouring townsfolk often described it as a place where even Onam would not reach! That, however, was not true at all.
Ever since I can remember we always celebrated Onam beautifully. Ladies on swings, singing songs and dancing the traditional ‘thiruvathirakali’, the men played the traditional 'Onakaligal' or Onam games, like ‘Panthukali’, with a ball or ‘panthu’ prepared by tying a few pebbles together with the fibres of plantain or coconut, in layers of dried-up plantain leaves. There would be the costumed performances of the tiger dance, the ‘Pulikali’ or the ‘Kaduvakali’ and then there were competitions. The village would get divided into East and West zones. Each side would build sculptures of bullocks and horses of hay and each team would try to outshine the other. The rising beats of the ‘Chenda’ or drums would bring in the penetrating and far-carrying tones of the ‘Nadaswaram’, the traditional double-reed wind instrument of the Southern-most states of India and there would be impassioned story-telling, kathakali performances, skits and ‘paatukacheri’ where the villagers would congregate to share and appreciate folk music and songs.
Onam celebrations were also witnessed in the temples of the village. Kottathala boasted of two temples. The villagers ran the upper temple, the Devi kshetram. Kadalamana, a wealthy landlord of the times, owned the Sri Krishna Swami kshetram or temple which lay at the base of the Devi kshetram. This lower temple was where elephant circumambulations would take place at Onam. Kathakali performances would be held in the open grounds outside the temples and there would be the ‘Chenda’ or ‘Pandi melams’, with performing artists from Tamil Nadu who would come to show off their skills on the drums. After India’s independence, the management of the Krishna Swami kshetram or the lower temple was taken over by the Devaswom board. This kshetram housed the Kottathala Warriem, which is the main setting of our story.
For those of you who don’t know this, Warriems were households that were attached to temples in pre-independence Kerala. The people of these homes or the Warriers were assigned the task of looking after most of the needs of the temples. The Brahmins did the actual worship but left the more mundane tasks like collecting flowers, stringing garlands, cleaning the inner sanctum and cooking the food that was given to the Gods as an offering, to this community. The Warriems were built adjoining the temples to give the family members easy access to the temple precincts.
Before we step into the Kottathala Warriem, let me first bring in the main character of my story, my mother Devaki Devi. She came to this village from the Kalarcode Warriem as a young bride. My dad, who we called Achan, was from the Warriem at Kottathala. Orphaned at an early age, he was brought up by his mother’s brother and when my mother made her entry into this home, Achan or Govinda Warrier and his aunt were the only two people in the house. Our knowledge of Achan’s early years is very hazy. We know that he had not completed his schooling, yet he knew some English, could read the newspaper, and had enough money and lots of land which he would rent out. Physically he was tall, well-built, handsome and of a formidable stature. Most of what we know of him is from the time the protagonist of our story, Devaki Devi or my Amma, comes into the picture.
The story goes, that one fine day with no real agenda of his own, Govinda Warrier set out for Alappuzha with a friend. His friend finished his business and returned to the village. Young Govinda decided to stay back and visit the Kalarcode Warriem in Alappuzha. This was his first visit to this place. In those days any Warriem was open to all Warriers, regardless of whether they were known to them or not. There was an unwritten code of conduct that any Warrier would get a mat and dinner at any Warriem. This happened here as well and Govinda Warrier was welcomed to the Kalarcode Warriem.
The next morning, the young guest was offered breakfast by the ladies of the house. The men folk came and made polite enquiries about his antecedents – who he was, where he had come from and other details. Knowing that he was not married made them happier still. There was an unmarried sister in the house and this dashing young man was indeed a prime candidate. What the family elders didn’t know was that the young man, had that morning gone to the pond for a wash and as luck would have it, had already met the two unmarried, young ladies of the house. One was the sister Madhavi for whom the family elders were actively looking for a groom and the other was their niece Devaki. Both were of the same age. Young Govinda had spoken to both the ladies and had instantly set his mind on marrying Devaki, if the family would allow it.
So, at breakfast, when the two older men of the house sat down to eat with their guest, the talk quickly moved to whether he had given any thought to marriage. As an orphan, Govinda knew he would have to speak for himself. He took the chance and asked for Devaki’s hand in marriage. The men were trying to get their sister married and this was not what they had in mind. Both of them were visibly unhappy and said as much. They pointed out that they were keen to get their young sister Madhavi married. Govinda Warrier said he had met both the ladies and was only interested in marrying Devaki. The hosts, not to be so easily deterred, now offered the young man their sister Madhavi along with the frills of a large wedding ceremony. They would spend on the marriage and pay for the celebrations, they promised. Since Devaki’s father was not a part of this household*, they added that they were not willing to take the responsibility of marrying her off or spending on her. The young man remained firm, “I won’t insist that I marry her here or that you spend on her. If you are in a position to hand her to me and bring her in the clothes that she is wearing, bearing nothing else, I will marry her with full fanfare and pay for the clothes, the jewellery, and I will bear the costs of the wedding. I will also do the ‘Kudiveppu’, he proclaimed. The ‘Kudivepu’ meant that the new bride would have a share in the home and property of the groom’s family. This declaration was a commitment that the young man would take complete responsibility of his bride and establish her formally as part of the new household.
Since they could not shake the young man’s resolve, Devaki Devi’s uncles finally agreed to bring her to Kottathala on the day and time that Govinda would set. This way, they figured they would be done with their responsibility of getting their niece married someday and at no cost. Overjoyed at his victory, the young suitor went back to his village, put together some money and planned his own wedding. He looked up a ‘muhurtham’ or an auspicious time for the marriage, invited his neighbours and community members and informed the bride’s family. Devaki was brought to the village and kept in the hall of the lower ‘kshetram’. She could not be taken into the house before the marriage took place. Surprisingly, she was brought there by her uncles with not a single woman from the house accompanying them, indicating that her family was still not thrilled for the young, fatherless girl. The scale of the wedding, however, showed that her new family was more than delighted to have her. A grand four-day affair ensued and there was excitement, joy and mirth all around. This was how Govinda married Devaki Devi. The ‘kudivepu’ was held as promised and thus Amma was established as a permanent part of this household.
This was how both, my family and this story start.
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* Notes:
Devaki Devi’s mother was ‘Kochu’ or small Parvathy. She was the head of the Kalarcode family. Being the eldest child in her family, she was asked to head the family home and she was made to stay back in the Warriem after marriage. Her younger sisters left home after they were married. So did all but one of her brothers. This one brother moved out of the main house and set up his own home in the same plot of land. So technically they lived on the same land but in different homes. Kochu Parvathy and her children lived in the Kizhakkedathu (East) Warriem, while her brother’s home was the Kalarcode Warriem, where Govinda was a guest.
The story goes that Kochu Parvathy had got married and had had two daughters Parukutty and Bhagirathi. Soon after this her husband took ill and was bedridden. It was clear that his days were numbered. A close friend of his, a young Warrier from a neighbouring Warriem would visit him regularly. This young friend Krishna Warrier was unmarried, educated and worked in the press in a fairly senior position. He was 21 and so was Kochu Parvathy. Their common love for poetry helped to forge a strong friendship between them and seeing this, her bedridden husband requested Krishna to take care of his wife after his death. The story goes that a ‘mundu’ was given by Krishna to Kochu Parvathy. To give a woman a ‘mundu’ or a waist cloth symbolised that the man had taken over the responsibility of the woman. ‘Sambandhams’, or consensual relationships, were common those days. These were sanctioned by the Matrilineal Laws which prevailed among upper caste Hindus of Kerala until the 1930s. In a sense, ‘Sambandham’ is similar to modern day live-in relationships but had a larger social and cultural approval in the Kerala of those days.
This relationship with Krishna Warrier resulted in Kochu Parvathy carrying his baby. The young father-to-be immediately sought permission from his mother to marry his now widowed partner and inform others in the society of the pact that was made between them, but his mother was adamant and refused. He was educated and eligible and could do better, she thought, than marrying a widow who already had two children. Krishna’s mother threatened to disown him if he married Kochu Parvathy. He was the only son in his family and realized that his hands were effectively tied. Finally, Krishna Warrier publicly accepted his paternity but expressed his inability to help with bringing up the little one, except to make an occasional presence in the child’s life. He was then married off to a more ‘suitable’ young lady. The baby born to Kochu Parvathy and Krishna Warrier was named Devaki Devi.
Devaki Devi then grew up with her mother, siblings and her mother’s family in the Kizhakkedathu Warriem. Her father was very fond of her and would visit her occasionally and ensure that he spent quality time with her, when possible.
Sometime after Devaki’s birth, Kochu Parvathy, was approached by another suitor. He was a simple man but a man of some means. The family insisted that she should be open to finding a stable partner and so she eventually agreed. He got married to her and stayed back at Kizhakkedathu Warriem. Their children were Ammukutty, who we called Ammuchitta followed by a pair of twins, Ramendran and Subhadra. Kochu Parvathy had six children in all, with three husbands.